Ah the bittersweet part of rescue: The youngest member of our troupe has found a forever home of his own! Yes the bouncing baby boy formerly known as Lucas is now Lucky Lucas.
It's hard to explain the mixed feelings of being a Foster Mom to four-legged ragamuffins. You take them in, clean them up, teach them some manners, show them lots of love -- basically treat them like they are your's forever. All the while working furiously to send them on their way so you can make room for another one.
For all the frayed nerves, expense and time put into each wild little thing you'd think I'd party when one finds a permanent home of their own. But no. Not I. I cry as I back out of the driveway of their new family. I cry when I get home and see their empty bed. I cry when I get out one-too-many treats.
But oh the smiles! I smile when I hear how well they are doing in their home. I smile when I see pictures of them and their new family. I smile as I clean up their bed and get it ready for the next lucky Eskie that will be cleaned up, taught some manners and shown lots of love.
Fostering: The hardest but best job in the world.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Poo Never Lies
Opening scene finds the Professors of Poo (Jeremy and Laurel) conversing about the recent Mystery of the Missing Carpet.
L: So who do you think murdered the thermometers?
J: Well it certainly was NOT the Princess Nanna!
L: How are we going to find out 'who done it'?
J: Elementary! I will question each suspect while holding the cover, er, rather, what's LEFT of the cover of the electronic victim.
As Professor of Poo 1 (Jeremy) questions each of the usual suspects (Aspen, Rumor and Honey Bear) with mangled cover in hand, each Eskie claims total innocence by sniffing the object and walking away with the most angelic demeanor ever displayed by four-footed fiends.
J: Well it had to be Honey Bear because Aspen always acts guilty.
L: But Honey Bear always acts guilty too and they both look innocent! Now what?
J: (ominously) Time will tell.
L: Huh?
J: Maybe tonight. Maybe tomorrow morning.
L: Huh? (Apparently the Mercury fumes were fogging Professor of Poo 2's thoughts!)
J: You KNOW . . . in the yard!
L: OH! Of course!
Now let me just say that neither PP1 nor PP2 attended any classes or seminars to rise to the glorified level of Professor of Poo. Nor did they intentionally pursue degrees in the field. It happened subconsciously, over time, during many hours of scooping, inspecting and analyzing miscellaneous piles. PPs can instantly tell even at a rake and pan handle's distance whether an object is pine cone, leaf or poo. PPs can find poo in Winter's snow or Autumn's leaves. PPs know which pile came from which pooch. PPs recognize non-food items ingested and expelled no matter how mutilated and degree of decomposition!
Later, back at the ranch -
J: Aspen.
L: Huh?
J: Aspen did it.
L: Did what? (Still under the effect of Mercury fumes? We hope so.)
J: Aspen murdered the thermometers.
L: How do you know? (Okay, now we're worried!)
J: In the yard. Plastic and other evidence.
L: Aha!
Aha indeed! The Poo Never Lies. And thus concludes the Mystery of the Missing Carpet.
L: So who do you think murdered the thermometers?
J: Well it certainly was NOT the Princess Nanna!
L: How are we going to find out 'who done it'?
J: Elementary! I will question each suspect while holding the cover, er, rather, what's LEFT of the cover of the electronic victim.
As Professor of Poo 1 (Jeremy) questions each of the usual suspects (Aspen, Rumor and Honey Bear) with mangled cover in hand, each Eskie claims total innocence by sniffing the object and walking away with the most angelic demeanor ever displayed by four-footed fiends.
J: Well it had to be Honey Bear because Aspen always acts guilty.
L: But Honey Bear always acts guilty too and they both look innocent! Now what?
J: (ominously) Time will tell.
L: Huh?
J: Maybe tonight. Maybe tomorrow morning.
L: Huh? (Apparently the Mercury fumes were fogging Professor of Poo 2's thoughts!)
J: You KNOW . . . in the yard!
L: OH! Of course!
Now let me just say that neither PP1 nor PP2 attended any classes or seminars to rise to the glorified level of Professor of Poo. Nor did they intentionally pursue degrees in the field. It happened subconsciously, over time, during many hours of scooping, inspecting and analyzing miscellaneous piles. PPs can instantly tell even at a rake and pan handle's distance whether an object is pine cone, leaf or poo. PPs can find poo in Winter's snow or Autumn's leaves. PPs know which pile came from which pooch. PPs recognize non-food items ingested and expelled no matter how mutilated and degree of decomposition!
Later, back at the ranch -
J: Aspen.
L: Huh?
J: Aspen did it.
L: Did what? (Still under the effect of Mercury fumes? We hope so.)
J: Aspen murdered the thermometers.
L: How do you know? (Okay, now we're worried!)
J: In the yard. Plastic and other evidence.
L: Aha!
Aha indeed! The Poo Never Lies. And thus concludes the Mystery of the Missing Carpet.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
The Mystery of the Missing Carpet
Today's episode begins on a beautiful Summer afternoon. Birds are singing. I'm happy to be home from "the real job" and looking forward to pitter-patter of little Eskie feet and chorus of welcoming barks.
As I open the door and the usual pandemonium ensues, all seems right with the world. Big Kitty greets me at the door and rolls over for his daily belly rub as if this day is the same as any other day.
I proceed to the den and wait for Bear, Rumor, Aspen and Savannah to sit and calm themselves -- or at least all of them to cease barking at the same time -- then I release them to the backyard so they can share their enthusiasm with the squirrels, birds and any other creatures silly enough to stray into their domain.
On my way to the front door I smile when I see the long, white, unbroken trail of toilet paper proceeding from the bathroom at the other end of the hall and proudly note the new distance record of 10 feet. I retrieve the mail and sort through it. Rats! We have not won a million dollars. Then I look up and see it. Time and I immediately freeze as my mind attempts to process the crime scene.
There in the middle of the living room, surrounded by a crowd of helpless, furry toy witnesses are the remains of both an electronic fever thermometer and it's old fashioned equivalent. That's right -- broken bits of plastic, glass and MERCURY! I remain motionless, frantically deciding whether to panic, cry, or both. When in doubt, get on the Internet!
As bad as ingesting broken glass may be for pets, a little voice in my head keeps screaming, "Mercury poisoning!" so my shaking fingers pound that into the search field. Sure enough -- Mercury fumes are deadly and there are explicit instructions on how to clean up a spill. Use gloves, double-bag, hazardous disposal, critical that every molecule be removed and without dispersing the deadly gas even more! ACK! Even dispose of what you wear during clean up. ACK! And dispose of everything that the Mercury has touched, could have touched, and a wide path around all of that just in case. ACK! Be very careful to not disturb the Mercury during disposal because that will just release more toxic fumes even faster. ACK! (The only good news is that the elemental Mercury in thermometers is not poisonous if ingested. Go figure.)
So I spring into action, change clothes, grab tools, prepare plastic bags, put on disposable gloves. Quick! Before we all have irreparable harm to our lungs!
Now, is this toxic Mercury spill on a solid surface where the balls of Mercury can be simply rounded up with an index card? No. Is it on a cheap throw rug that can be easily discarded? No. It's in the middle of wall-to-wall carpeting! And that is why there is now a 3 foot by 4 foot patch of bright blue carpet padding perfectly framed by lovely mauve carpet in the middle of my formal living room.
Everyone is fine. No permanent damage. But what about the huge chunk of missing carpet? Well it just so happens that there are beautiful hardwood floors under that bright blue padding so we now know which project is next in our do-it-yourself home improvement.
Now they don't call mysteries "who-done-it's" for nothing. So who was the culprit? Stay tuned for an episode featuring the Professors of Poo!
As I open the door and the usual pandemonium ensues, all seems right with the world. Big Kitty greets me at the door and rolls over for his daily belly rub as if this day is the same as any other day.
I proceed to the den and wait for Bear, Rumor, Aspen and Savannah to sit and calm themselves -- or at least all of them to cease barking at the same time -- then I release them to the backyard so they can share their enthusiasm with the squirrels, birds and any other creatures silly enough to stray into their domain.
On my way to the front door I smile when I see the long, white, unbroken trail of toilet paper proceeding from the bathroom at the other end of the hall and proudly note the new distance record of 10 feet. I retrieve the mail and sort through it. Rats! We have not won a million dollars. Then I look up and see it. Time and I immediately freeze as my mind attempts to process the crime scene.
There in the middle of the living room, surrounded by a crowd of helpless, furry toy witnesses are the remains of both an electronic fever thermometer and it's old fashioned equivalent. That's right -- broken bits of plastic, glass and MERCURY! I remain motionless, frantically deciding whether to panic, cry, or both. When in doubt, get on the Internet!
As bad as ingesting broken glass may be for pets, a little voice in my head keeps screaming, "Mercury poisoning!" so my shaking fingers pound that into the search field. Sure enough -- Mercury fumes are deadly and there are explicit instructions on how to clean up a spill. Use gloves, double-bag, hazardous disposal, critical that every molecule be removed and without dispersing the deadly gas even more! ACK! Even dispose of what you wear during clean up. ACK! And dispose of everything that the Mercury has touched, could have touched, and a wide path around all of that just in case. ACK! Be very careful to not disturb the Mercury during disposal because that will just release more toxic fumes even faster. ACK! (The only good news is that the elemental Mercury in thermometers is not poisonous if ingested. Go figure.)
So I spring into action, change clothes, grab tools, prepare plastic bags, put on disposable gloves. Quick! Before we all have irreparable harm to our lungs!
Now, is this toxic Mercury spill on a solid surface where the balls of Mercury can be simply rounded up with an index card? No. Is it on a cheap throw rug that can be easily discarded? No. It's in the middle of wall-to-wall carpeting! And that is why there is now a 3 foot by 4 foot patch of bright blue carpet padding perfectly framed by lovely mauve carpet in the middle of my formal living room.
Everyone is fine. No permanent damage. But what about the huge chunk of missing carpet? Well it just so happens that there are beautiful hardwood floors under that bright blue padding so we now know which project is next in our do-it-yourself home improvement.
Now they don't call mysteries "who-done-it's" for nothing. So who was the culprit? Stay tuned for an episode featuring the Professors of Poo!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
