It was a dark and stormy night . . .

I think I know why Snoopy in the Peanuts comic strip always started his stories out, "It was a dark and stormy night." He or one of his litter mates were probably afraid of storms so it was the scariest setting he could think of for his literary efforts.

I used to enjoy the deep rumblings, exciting flashes and, if I didn't have to venture outside, the sound of the peaceful falling rain. And then there were dogs in my life.

As if it wasn't hard enough convincing them they need to perform all necessary bodily functions outside as usual, there's the frequent foster or four-legged visitor that acts as if every thunder storm is punishment from God for every bad thought and evil deed and like Adam in the Garden of Eden they run and hide as if the next lightning bolt has their name on it.

Popular thought is to ignore them and not reward their fearful behavior. This works for some.

Several Eskies have responded well to calmly holding them throughout the storm and ignoring the storm instead of ignoring the Eskie. Of course if you have chores to do or are sitting in your favorite chair checking email on your laptop it can get pretty interesting if your four-legged friend is over 30 pounds!

Some have preferred to go into their crates with all their favorite things and hide there under the storm passes. This is fine as long as they are not panting and working themselves up even more.

I'd love to hear what has worked for others. Meanwhile here's hoping the skies are blue!

Storm Damage

Friday the tornados missed our neighborhood even though we could see rotation in the clouds as they passed over. Other areas near by were not so fortunate. Even though they were small, weak and short-lived tornados and no one was killed they devastated the lives of those they did touch.

Saturday Hurricane Ike was far to our South and now it looks like even Ike's heavy rains will miss our area.

So what storm damage do we have? Let's call it Hurricane Honey Bear. Hater of all who dare pass within his eyesight. Protector of all property from intruders. First responder to all knocks at the door.

The scene is set in the living room at the front of house, graced with a large window. To protect the window from direct hits by Hurricane Honey Bear a couch has been placed in front of the window. To be specific it is a settee that was thoughtfully covered with leather to withstand Hurricane Honey Bear but said leather is definitly showing wear and in some places has given up the fight altogether.

Whenever intruders threaten Hurricane Honey Bear gathers speed and with all the force his 40 pounds can muster he launches towards that large front window a million times a day. Most of the time the settee can manage to stay on all four of it's delicate legs but sometimes it will teeter backwards towards the window and many times it will tilt back all the way and tip over to the point it meets the window sill. You'd think it would scare the dog so bad he'd remember not to do such a crazy stunt. But alas he hates intruders more than he fears tipping over.

Meanwhile in the kitchen Big Kitty is playing in safety with the door closed so Hurricane Honey Bear can't eat him as a quick snack. Big Kitty, being a smart cat and loving to taunt the stupid canines, has learned to knock on the kitchen door to get the dogs barking. I never hear Big Kitty laughing out loud but he always has a very smug look on his face after one of these ruses.

So during a rare quiet moment this Saturday afternoon while The Staff is checking email and reading the paper in the den, Big Kitty gets bored and knocks on the kitchen door. Hurricane Honey Bear leaps into action and at full speed and full volume lauches towards the living room and the poor settee. Suddenly there's a loud CRUNCH THUD and silence.

Staff 1: "I don't EVEN want to know what that was."

Staff 2: "Okay. I'll go see what it was." Silence. "OMG!" Silence.

Hurricane Honey Bear had blasted the settee through the window.

Thank God for double-paned windows, cardboard and duct tape. Anbody know a good repairman?

Do Cats have Lips?

We interrupt our normal Eskie programming for an important bulletin: Cats Have Lips.

How do I know? Because they require Chapstick.

I can see the doubt and disbelief on your face but I can assure you that it must be true.
If you come to my house and accidentally drop your Chapstick or leave it on a flat surface (doesn't matter what size the area is because apparently cats can fit into places that are ten times smaller than they are) Benson (The Cat) will claim it and hide it from you and the Eskies.

Well, to be exact he will play hockey with it -- batting it at land speeds heretofore never achieved indoors. Wood and tile are best but he reaches respectable speeds on carpet too -- with the exception of the speed bump created by the missing carpet (http://eskiepades.blogspot.com/2008/08/mystery-of-missing-carpet.html).

I suppose I could be mistaken about Cats having lips and it's more of a case that they just like torpedo shaped objects for their aerodynamic properties. But I still think investment in a nanny-cam would be worth it if we catch the cat getting the lid off the Chapstick and better yet getting that lid back on. You see The Cat knows the Eskies will steal the Chapstick and eat it if they catch wind of it.